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This guidebook and webinar above 👆 is robust, and will help you begin creating health and ease with your emotions, and understanding your emotional experience better. There’s also journaling and tools throughout.

Emotions Wheel

This emotions wheel (and you can also google “emotions wheel” to find many more) is a great way to start identifying what emotion you’re feeling. You can start from the center and work your way out until you’ve landed on it. Note: You may be feeling multiple emotions at the same time! That’s totally ok and normal.

Emotions Communicating Needs Table

If you’re feeling one of the emotions on the left, you can look at this table to see what it might be communicating to you, and what need you might have that is currently unmet.

Once you know what you’re needing, you can find helpful ways to meet that need, whether on your own or in relationship with others.

Sadness / GriefThere has or may be a loss.Healing
Fear / AnxietyDanger or a threatSafety
AngerSomeone is taking advantage or it’s not fair.Protection or a boundary
LonelinessI don’t have enough support or connection.Connection
ShameThe thought “There is something wrong with me.”Social and/or self-acceptance or approval

Here are a few tools that can be helpful specifically for anxiety, as shared by one of my teachers and coaches, Brooke Nielsen, LMFT:

Tool #1: Somatic Tools

  • Press your hands together, and feel the pressure as you push inwards.
  • Another similar one is to put one hand on your forehead and one hand at the base of your skull and push both hands inwards, almost like giving your head a hug.

Tool #2: Belly Breathing

Follow these simple steps for an immediate sense of calm and grounding:

  1. Place your hand on your lower belly, below your belly button.
  2. Inhale as deeply as you can, pushing your belly out like it’s a balloon.
  3. Hold your breath for one second.
  4. Exhale slowly.
  5. Repeat four more times.

Deep belly breathing is one of the most commonly recommended on-the-spot practices to calm your nervous system (and, thus, anxiety).

Tool #3: “VOO”

Sit comfortably, take a deep breath, and say “VOO”, extending the word until you run out of breath. Then inhale and repeat. Do this for 1-2 minutes. Saying the word “VOO” creates a vibration that activates your vagus nerve, calming your nervous system.